


The Great Butt Debate

by chuugum (bonsvii)



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Crack, Dialogue Heavy, F/F, Fluff, but cute, gfriend big brains for starting this, kind of?, the great butt debate, they're at a park lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:06:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28088217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bonsvii/pseuds/chuugum
Summary: “Jeon Heejin, you are the devil. I think I broke my butt,” Hyunjin groans, dusting herself off as she stands.“So, is it in four pieces now, or two?”
Relationships: Jeon Heejin/Kim Hyunjin
Comments: 8
Kudos: 62





	The Great Butt Debate

**Author's Note:**

> would like to preface this by saying that i believe a butt is a singular body part !! it just is !!

“Hyunjin?” Heejin asks innocently from her perch at the top of the slide, looking down on Hyunjin, who sits cross-legged on the tarmac. Hyunjin knows exactly what’s coming by now; she’s been in this situation enough times to preempt when Heejin will be in one of  _ those _ moods. She used to find Heejin’s penchant for asking questions a little annoying, back when they didn’t know each other well, but she’s always been more endeared than anything else, and has come to adore it.

“Hyunjin?” She whines again, drawing out the name. “I have a question.” 

“I’m coming up,” Hyunjin smiles, taking large strides to climb up the slide and sit beside Heejin. “Ask away, baby.” And if Heejin blushes at that, nobody mentions anything.

“This is very important and it might end our relationship. Please think carefully before you answer.” Had it been anyone else talking to her, Hyunjin would probably be alarmed at the seriousness with which the warning was given, but this is Heejin and nothing about the situation is out of the ordinary. “Is a butt one body part or two?” Her brow is furrowed and she looks so concerned about the whole thing that Hyunjin can’t help but let out a chuckle. She reaches out and pets Heejin’s hair, moving her hand slowly down to her forehead to smooth out the creases in the skin. “I’m serious! I saw Gfriend talking about it and rifts were created in what I previously thought to be the perfect group dynamic! You’re the most important person in my life, I need to know that we have the same opinion on this!”

Hyunjin thinks for a moment, considering the question fully. “Exactly how much importance are you placing on my answer to this?”

A scandalised gasp from Heejin. “Lots! I told you, this could end our relationship and we won’t be soulmates anymore and my mum will never make you apple pie ever again!” 

Hyunjin feigns fainting, placing a hand to her forehead in mock-distress. “I don’t think I’d survive in a world without that apple pie…” Heejin swats her playfully, aghast. “And you, of course.” She pecks Heejin’s lips, pulling away with a smirk. “Yeah, you’re cool, I guess… bro.”

The amused smile drops off Heejin’s face with almost terrifying speed. “That is a prohibited word. Please exit the slide.”

Hyunjin’s protests fall on deaf ears, Heejin fully committed to carrying out her exile — grabbing her girlfriend by the arms, Heejin begins wrestling her down the slide. Hyunjin allows herself to be escorted away, saluting solemnly before sliding down comically slowly, the rubber soles of her trainers creating too much friction. She gets stuck halfway down, Heejin tugging off her own shoes to slide down behind her at terrifying speed, slamming into her and sending the both of them flying onto the ground below in fits of giggles.

“Jeon Heejin, you are the  _ devil. _ I think I broke my butt,” Hyunjin groans, dusting herself off as she stands.

“So, is it in four pieces now, or two?” Heejin grins, waggling her eyebrows. “You’re not off the hook with this one. I will ask again: is a butt one or two body parts? And I want  _ reasoning _ .”

Hyunjin clears her throat, ready to declare her answer for better or for worse. Heejin watches raptly, still in a heap on the ground. “It is my humble opinion that a butt is a singular body part, and here are my reasons. Firstly, the noun ‘butt’ is singular. Whilst it may be comprised of buttcheeks, the butt itself is one entity, just as the heart is a singular organ comprised of four chambers.” Heejin’s face is unreadable, so Hyunjin continues, assuming she’s in the clear. “Secondly, one may purchase a pair of socks, or perhaps a pair of gloves. But the butt requires only one set of underwear. I conclude the debate with this.”

Heejin shows an indication of emotion for the first time, lips quirking up into a smug smile. “You see, that’s where you’d be wrong.”

Hyunjin’s face falls, hands gripping her hair as she sinks to her knees with a groan. “Outsmarted once again!”

“As a counterargument, I’d like to say that your point about underwear — a singular garment is known as a pair, indicating that two body parts are concealed within. Furthermore, a single piece of clothing is worn on the breasts—” 

Hyunjin giggles at that. “Please never use the word ‘breasts’ again, you’re giving me flashbacks to high school sex ed.”

Heejin just pouts, continuing. “Whatever. You wear one bra, but nobody would call boobs one body part. The butt is also clearly made up of two hemispheres, there’s really no denying that it is not singular.”

Hyunjin refuses to concede, spluttering feeble arguments that Heejin dismisses, the debate long since won. In the end, she resorts to flicking Heejin on the forehead and meowing rebelliously, running away before Heejin can catch up to her to retaliate.

**Author's Note:**

> ty for reading <3


End file.
